Tomorrow is Not Today

Dr. Grace Sha_TINT
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Kingsley: [00:00:00] Welcome to The Tomorrow Is Not Today podcast. You've already started to create the life you want just by being here, designed for you as a business professional so you can be physically, mentally, and emotionally healthy, more productive, less stressed, and living a life you truly love. My name's Kingsley and thank you for coming on another journey with one of our uniquely qualified professionals.

Welcome to the Tomorrow's Not Today podcast. It's glad to have you with us today again, and I'm very excited today because one of the things that a lot of us miss out on in life, because I think maybe we just give up too soon. Don't push on hard enough or go far enough in. What we want to do is this little thing called resilience.

Now, resilience is not easy to get. It's not easy to. Become that type of person and it takes practicing resilience. I think a lot in doing this, [00:01:00] and I have an expert in the studio today. Dr. Grace Shar, thank you for joining us in the studio. I.

Garce: Thank you for having me Kingsley.

Kingsley: So one of the things I want to talk about and we'll get into your background and your history and that sort of thing, which is gonna be fantastic, but you focus a lot in your presentations in the work that you do, the book that you're writing, all this sort of thing on resilience.

What is resilience?

Garce: Good question. Um, so resilience by dictionary definition is actually the capacity to bounce back from challenges, but I like to think of it as the capacity to actually bounce forward and move forward and evolve and become better because of what's happened to you.

Kingsley: So when you say bounce back, 'cause a lot of, a lot of things happen to people and. We can tend to retreat then. Yes. When you say bounce forward, does that mean that you've defeated that and you keep going? Or can that be something that maybe still is in your mind but you're gonna push through anyway? How does that work [00:02:00] exactly?

Garce: I think it's more, um, letting your past actually make you a better person.

So. You know, as you know, I've had a history where I, I came out of a really poor relationship and when I met my good husband now, um, Nick I was a little bit afraid of sharing what's happened to me with him. Uh, but when I actually did share what he said actually really helped me look at it from a different perspective.

So he actually said, no, it's not baggage. It's actually what made you who you are, and I like who you are. So I think. That's what we want. Um, that to let our past, um, not define us to be a victim, but a victor, and how can we actually learn from our experiences and use it for good.

Kingsley: So for people to be able to do that, because it could have been baggage or it could be something that grows you into a better person, which has obviously happened with you.

How do people go from, I'm a victim or this could [00:03:00] turn me into a victim to No, I'm a bigger, better person. What has to happen in our mind for that to take place?

Garce: Yeah. I think it is a, a mindset thing, and this is actually what I actually teach a lot in my talks and in my workshops, um, for both. Personal resilience and having a resilient workplace.

But I think on a personal level, I actually talk about it in an acronym, which is actually Grace. It's not because I love my name, but it, it helps people remember my name. But actually the word grace, I grew up as a, a Christian and it's, you know, this really vague concept of a merited kindness from God to sinful human.

But, in, you know, nowadays in everyday society, people use the word grace in terms of kindness and compassion. And you know, I like to use that word as the acronym because it reminds me to be kind to myself as well as to others. And grace, the mindset for me, uh, includes ge, which is gratitude and [00:04:00] perspective, and then i's for rest and recharge.

And A is for acceptance. And then not just acceptance, but actually taking action and having the courage to change what you can change. And C is to have compassion, but also connection. And E is to actually evolve and grow from your situation. That's awesome.

Kingsley: I love that. That's fantastic. Like if we could just.

Use that in our life every day, we'd all be so much better off.

Garce: Yeah. That's what I hope and aim to do every day. And I think speaking about it reminds me and keeps me accountable for it, but I believe that if I can share that with people a lot of people will be the wellbeing will increase and the way that they see life will change as well.

Kingsley: Yeah, no, that I absolutely love that. Now I'm gonna. Change a little bit right here because you talk about resilience, you've lived resilience, you help businesses with resilience. Mm. But you're a [00:05:00] dentist.

Garce: Yes. Yeah. Some good question that, yeah. Take, take

Kingsley: me on this little journey of dentist to resilience trainer or helper or whatever.

Garce: Yeah. So, um, a lot of people wonder, like. What do you do? Why do you do it? Or like, why is this dentist on stage talking about, well, I talked about burnout prevention for quite a while but now I've realized that I don't wanna just focus on, on burnout and the negative parts of the story, but how can we actually move forward?

And that's why I wanna help people actually build resilience so that. Regardless of whether it's burnout or stress or other challenges in life, that lay can actually come out of it better. Um, so yeah, uh, I actually, you know, grew up as a high achiever, um, as many dentists probably are. Um, I actually taught my high school and then taught my uni as well.

So I was on this path to success and I was a human doing and not a human being. So I was always thinking about what can I do next? What can I [00:06:00] do next? What. Achievement and award can I get? But no one's gonna give you a award for being a good family dentist. So a few years out from graduation, I was like, oh I've gotta find a way to get that extra certificate.

So I was thinking about going back and, um, I. Studying more. Uh, and that's actually when my research supervisor from uni, who I really admired he passed away from natural causes, but he was in his thirties and he was found on a Sunday in the postgraduate room. Wow. And. That raises questions for me as to, you know, why do I truly wanna go back and study more?

Is that really what I'm passionate about? Is this what I wanna devote my life to? And I realized that when I was going into uni exams, um, I, I actually said in all the interviews I wanted to dentistry over medicine because it's. The easiest way to go on short term mission trips. I grew up, you know, um, seeing a lot of, um, medical missionaries [00:07:00] and, uh, you know, really wanting to make a difference and help people.

And, you know, everyone's got teeth and everyone needs a good dentist, whereas, uh, if I was you know, a surgeon, not everyone might need my help. So. I realized at that point that I'd never actually gone on that overseas volunteer trip that I said I was going to do. And I, I registered with an organization that was reputable and they actually allocated me to a mental health team.

And I was like, just checking, you know, I'm a dentist. And, um, they, they said, oh, but you are bilingual. So I was actually translating lectures for psychiatrist, psychologists and social workers for a few weeks, as well as working on the dental team in psych wards. And I. It's really true when they say, you know, life is about giving, and you actually get so much more from giving.

Uh, so a lot of people who go and help others actually realize that, you know, you are changed yourself for the better. And, uh, when I came back I realized I wasn't limited in my options. I didn't need to just, you know, go and specialize and [00:08:00] study more or open a practice. I have other options and I have other transferrable skills.

Um, so when I came back, I started doing more personal development courses, business courses, and I ended up opening a allied health practice with my husband at the time. And, uh, I, I kept sort of trying to grow and do things outside of dentistry, but what I neglected was actually growing with my partner.

And we actually you know, went on very different paths and didn't understand each other's whys anymore. And, uh, that's actually when he decided to lock me in a, a psych ward. So he, um, yeah. Uh. Unfortunately, you know, like, uh, was a little bit misguided and, um, yeah, reported me as a health professional who had mental health issues.

I actually became, got cleared of that, but I had to go through quite a big process of going through the mental health tribunal system with the dental board. And I learned a lot about myself and, um. I guess got a different perspective [00:09:00] because I went from someone volunteering in the psych ward and thinking, you know, I was this high and mighty health professional from a first world country with good mental health system, helping other people to living in our mental health system and seeing the other side of it and also.

Having gratitude that I had experiences in that so that I was able to survive the ordeal and actually, you know, help some people along the way. Um, the hospital chaplain came and asked me, oh, maybe you should do a chaplaincy course. You all these girls don't wanna kill themselves anymore. I'm like, yeah.

'cause they realize their husband's not as bad as mine. Um, so yeah. So, I think I realized during that process that maybe you know, there is a better plan for me and there are reasons why things have happened so that I can use my experiences for good. You know, after my. Divorce. Uh, I also had the opportunity to go to South Africa through Virgin Unite and, um, you know, spend time with a lot of [00:10:00] entrepreneurs.

Got to meet Richard Branson, spend time with him at his private reserve, and, um, met Nelson Mandela's wife and sat in the same boardroom as her. And I think all of these experiences made me think that. I have a reason. There's a reason for all of these things happening, and I need to share what I've learned from my experiences to help others.

And I found that as I had to share my stories with my friends, people were inspired or encouraged. Um, so that's how I ended up. Being invited to speak at some corporate events and you know, slowly over the last few years spoke at quite a lot of conferences, um, and sort of figuring out how do I use this for good and, you know, do more workplace training and sort of morphed into something beyond just sharing my story, but about how can we create better systems for workplaces and how can we help people.

Our lucky country build resilience and perspective on life.

Kingsley: Yeah, no, I, [00:11:00] and, and I think what you just said there is such a critical thing that we, when we do put things into perspective mm-hmm. Um, I. We go down the resilience. 'cause obviously you've had a bunch of resilient things to work with, which is why, you know what you're talking about now.

It's a lived experience. Yes. It's not something you can just study. You have to live it to actually make it happen. You can't study resilience and go, okay, I am resilient now. It doesn't, it's not like becoming a dentist. Yes. As much as it's practiced to it. Yes. Um, you study and you know, all this.

Stuff what to do. But when it's resilience or something like that, there is no, I've studied this, here I am, I've got my certificate. Yeah. It's part of life. Mm-hmm. And I, I think being able to put that into perspective, like you just said, and understand we are in really in a lucky country. And building that resilience is going to help us in so many different ways.

Yes. So what are the, some of the things when you are dealing with people, whether it's Oh. A corporate organization or individuals? Mm. What are [00:12:00] some of the things you help them with to build that resilience in themselves?

Garce: Mm. I think oftentimes when I'm speaking, I share about my journey and sometimes that gives people a lot of perspective mm-hmm.

In life. And, uh, I also do team training workshops, so how can we communicate better and connect with each other better, um, as a team? So I find that. Even in my day-to-day dental practice, I still practice dentistry part-time. Mm-hmm. Um, that's really applicable because oftentimes people actually just want someone to actually listen and care about them and to hear their story and then maybe to offer a different perspective.

I really like this picture. I've seen of counseling where they sort of have. All these strings, tangled strings in their mind when things are happening. But when you actually talk about it with someone else, sometimes they roll that string up and you know, tidy up and give you a different sort of yeah.

View on things. [00:13:00] So I think, yeah, it's applicable for professionally as well as personally. Yeah.

Kingsley: So what would you say to, 'cause a lot of our audience is business owners or business professionals.

Garce: Yeah.

Kingsley: Let's say an ENT entrepreneur. Yeah. Because, and as you know, when, when you're doing that, you are up and down all the time.

Yes. Things are, it could be the same day, it could be the same hour. Yeah. Uh, it could be the same week, whatever, but, but do you know just being in small business or being an entrepreneur or whatever, there is this massive rollercoaster ride that you're on. Yes. What are some tips, say three things that you would say to any entrepreneur to help build that resilience?

Garce: Hmm. Three tips, I think. I like gratitude because I think in any situation you can actually have gratitude. I think people often think having gratitude means, you know, things are going well. So I, I like to talk about like, gratitude for your past, like, so whether things are, you know, [00:14:00] for. Grateful for what you have as well as your past experiences, even the negative ones, so that because they have made you who you are and how can you use for your pains for a positive purpose, and then being grateful for what you have in the present as well.

But also being grateful and hopeful for the future. Um, a story I like to share is when I was in South Africa. We went and volunteered and mentored young people who were brought out from the park, poorest part of Johannesburg, and they were in this, um, you know, institute where they were giving them a business degree so that they can bring their family out of poverty.

And these young people, they welcomed us in song and they were so joyful and they were dressed to the nines, like, you know, business outfits. But then in the afternoon they took us to their homes. And the girl who was. Taking us to her home. She was dressed in this bright yellow dress in high heels. But she lived in like a tin shanty shack, and she shared a room with her aunt and their room looked like Harry Potter's [00:15:00] cupboard under the stairs.

But these young people actually told us we are not previously disadvantaged individuals. That's what they label them as in, in South Africa. They go, I'm not a PDI, I'm A CEO because I'm currently exposed to opportunities. Wow. And I think. That really resonated with me because. During that time, I was going through this tough time where I didn't know what my future looked like and I was coming out from, you know, a 10 year relationship and thinking, what do I do now, you know, in my thirties starting over again, but actually having that hope that no matter what's happened.

You are currently exposed to opportunity and being grateful for what you have, and especially coming back to Australia, we are exposed to so much opportunities. So I think that's one big part that I like to share. And, um, that's

Kingsley: massive perspective there. Yes. Like in that situation, yes. When watching someone like that all dressed up, looking fantastic and going back to the reality, mm, that is a massive.

[00:16:00] Perspective.

Garce: Yeah. And they, they have so much joy.

Kingsley: Yeah. Yeah. And

Garce: um, I think when you go and travel and look at different countries, you always find different perspective. I'm always so grateful when I come home, like even when I'm not doing volunteering work. You know, me and Nick went to Peru a few years back and.

We stopped over at San Francisco where, you know, it's thriving metropolis, but people are so depressed and, um, so angry and not happy to have the tourists there. And then you go to Peru where you pay them $10 and this guy is running up the hill for 40 minutes next to a horse that you are riding, and they're so grateful and they're so happy to have you there, and they're not depressed because of their circumstances.

So I think, you know, we really learn a lot from looking at other people. Yeah, that's, yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. Yep. Yeah. And um, so that's probably the first one that I like to share. And then the second one is probably the rest, rest and recharge. Um, because I think if you don't take time, and I know this is [00:17:00] something you are passionate about as well, looking after your health, um, you know, sleep and nutrition and self-care, because if you don't do that, then you might.

Have my experience where you are forced to take some time off and then you get three meals a day in hospital and all your technology taken off. You people pay good money for those retreats now, right? Yeah, yeah. That's right. Yeah. Um, learning, uh, where your boundaries are and how to, how do you take rest and recharge, not just physically, but also mentally and emotionally as well.

Uh, and the third thing is I, I like to talk about the acceptance a lot because I think. Accepting what you can't change. A lot of times in workplaces, people tell me, like, when I'm you know, talking to staff members, they go, oh, I can't be bothered. Like, I, I can't be bothered to give feedback because nothing ever changes.

Um, so they don't actually advocate for themselves and they don't communicate and they don't connect. So I think when people think that it's a hopeless situation, um, they [00:18:00] don't actually take any action and they don't have the courage to look at what they. Can and can't change. Um, so I think not just accepting what's happened that you can't control but actually looking at what you can control.

And a lot of times you can control your perspective. You can control how you react. You can control whether you forgive or not. So yeah, I think those are very important.

Kingsley: That's, yeah. No, that's, that's really interesting. And, and the whole thing of about becoming resilient from those areas, and they're, and they're things that we can all do.

Yes. They're not things that you can't do. Yeah. We can all do those sorts of things and I think even going through harder times, looking at some of the perspective on things, being grateful for things and you know, some things they just are, you can't control it. Yeah. So don't bother trying 'cause you just get frustrated in the middle of that Anyway, as much as we.

Still want to. Yeah. Um, yeah, no, I think that's fantastic. So these, these things that individuals can do, is it [00:19:00] different for corporations or do you try and get organizations to pretty much follow the similar, similar things?

Garce: Uh, no. So I think there's two aspects to my work. I think, uh, I spend a lot of time doing the talks to inspire individuals, but when I go into organizations, it's actually workshops on you know, how do you.

Connect and communicate as a team, as well as leadership training. So, you know, the leaders need to look at themselves and how do they self care so that they can care for their team and their clients better? And how do we actually establish a purpose and actually know. Why do we do what we do? Um, you know, I really like Simon, Simon Sinek.

Start with why. Yeah. Um, actually knowing the why before you do the how and then getting the what. Um, I think too many times people look at their jobs and they just look at the, you know. Whether it's paying well, whether we're a reputable organization, and that's actually the what If you start with your passion and purpose and then you can actually influence your team to actually [00:20:00] understand that and be on the same page.

Then people will actually understand why they're doing what they're doing day to day. And um, we know that nearly half. Of individuals who go for interviews actually want to work with organizations that actually help grow them and make them feel like they're doing something of value. And that's why people stay with not-for-profits for so long, even though it might not pay quite as well.

But if they actually see a passion and a purpose for what they're doing, it actually impacts them. So, yeah, so that's that. The part for leaderships, uh, but for teams so much of it is about communication and conflict resolution, um, and actually learning how to connect as a team. So that's a sort of a different part to building a resilient team in organizations.

Mm-hmm.

Kingsley: It's interesting because. When you talked about the leaders there, initially we were talking about them doing the self-care and looking after themselves, and obviously that's gonna make them more resilient, but then ob there would be the overflow into the teams, which helps with the communication and mm-hmm.

And all of that [00:21:00] sort of thing as well. Yeah. So. Is it important then as team leaders, as entrepreneurs or whatever, um, obviously they need to look after themselves. How do they then encourage their team to actually look after themselves as well

Garce: that

Kingsley: way?

Garce: Yeah, I think I talk about this in my keynote talks a lot, so, that everyone is actually a leader.

Because for example, in a dental practice, they go, oh yeah, the dentist or the owner is the leader. But actually there's so many points of contacts when the client comes in, right? Or the patient, um, they come to the front desk. So the receptionist is the leader in that instance. And then, you know, when they actually being walked out of the room and the nurse might be the leader.

In that instance, or whoever's picking up the phone. So, and actually all of us are actually influencing people every day in our life, regardless of our job title. So how are you showing up and how are you, whether you are leading people towards good or away from good? And so I think, uh, knowing that. [00:22:00] All of us are important, and we are actually influencing and leading people in how we act, and it's, you are actually an important part of the team.

Um, so actually helping members of the team understand that and that they, what they do is of value. It's not just the dentist who's actually in charge of facing the clients.

Kingsley: Yeah. I really love how you said that, so that everybody, no matter what their role is, they are a leader in some degree. And that they then need to as well step up to the plate.

Mm. Take on the responsibility themselves. And, and you can see how if people did that Yeah. Then the whole organization's gonna work better. You're gonna have a better culture. Mm. Everyone's gonna work better together. The communication obviously is gonna be better. They'll feel better about themselves.

Yes. Um. I really love how you explained that. I think that's fantastic.

Garce: Yeah. So yeah, a lot of my work is actually about building positive team culture. A culture is actually how do [00:23:00] people think about what we do, what we do as a team and also how does your team. Talk about your work when you're not there.

Um, when I go and make an appointment somewhere, or when I'm interviewing someone for childcare for my kid, you know, I always ask, I don't talk to the director, but I might ask the receptionist or the other teacher in the room like, how long have you worked here for? How are you found finding this place?

And. Having positive cultures when your team will go to the local shops or talk to someone when you're not present and actually, you know, really rate your organization and go, this is a fantastic place. I love it here. I've been here for 10 years. You know? Yeah. That's fantastic.

Kingsley: I absolutely love that. Now you said earlier that 'cause you're doing a lot of resilience.

Work at the moment. Yeah. You talked initially a lot of what you were doing is around burnout, so explain the difference between those two

Garce: for me. Oh, so I think resilience is what I [00:24:00] realize people need. To overcome burnout, but also, you know, to overcome other CHA challenges in their life because burnout is actually defined by the WHO as being an occupational, you know, phenomenon.

It's not a mental health condition, but just simply. Symptoms that occur when you have chronic workplace stress that's poorly managed. Okay, so it's very focused on workplace and I find a lot of people who speak about burnout is focused on the organizational part. Like that, you know, the work needs to support people and not burning out the organization needs to change, but less about.

The individual, like how can they respond? Gotcha. Regardless of their circumstance or their work. And sometimes people go, oh, I'm burnt out so I need to change my job every few years. And that's actually happening more and more. There's less loyalty and people are less engaged with their work now. But it's actually you.

Like [00:25:00] you take yourself everywhere. So regardless of where you work if you actually don't deal with yourself and you actually learn to change your mindset regardless of what's happening to yourself you're gonna face the same problem again in a year or two down the track. So that's why I believe that you know, slightly morphing my message and focusing on helping people build a resilient mindset and then helping teams.

Build that resilient, positive team culture is even more important.

Kingsley: So it sounds like whether you're talking about burnout, resilience, or whatever it is, it all comes back to looking after yourself, proactively looking after yourself, having the gratitude side of things, um, making sure that you are physically, mentally healthy, taking care of you to a large degree.

Garce: I think. Yes and no because self-care I think can come off as a bit selfish. Like I've spoken to some medical colleagues, for example, you know, um, and they go, oh [00:26:00] yeah, now people can take a lot of self-care leave or mental health leave. But then while they're doing that, the rest of their team are suffering.

Yes. So we actually need to think about self-care as. How can we do it in a not selfish way? Yes. Self-care is about putting on your own oxygen mask so that you can help others first so that you're not just surviving day to day, but also the aim for self-care is actually to look after your team better and to look after your patients or your clients better.

Mm. So, uh, like. It's a very different mindset. It's not, you know, self-care so that I can go you know, take holiday and let everyone else look after and pick up after me.

Kingsley: And there's definitely a big difference between self-care looking after me to be a better person than mm-hmm. Well stuff you I'm outta here 'cause I don't feel real good, so I'm just gonna go.

And it doesn't matter how it affects you. Yeah. There's definitely a bigger difference in that. Yeah. And it's, I'm glad you pointed that out. Mm-hmm. Because it can, it can look like that sometimes. Yeah. And I've, I've talked to other [00:27:00] people as well who are like, this person really needed help, but.

They didn't think about the rest of the team or whatever and any effect it could have been or, and how maybe we could have communicated a little bit better to make sure everybody in the whole operation and organization's actually doing better with that as well.

Garce: Yeah, that's right. So I think. Like that communication, open communication and connecting with each other.

And I talk about like care, self-care, but also like for example, in healthcare, like practicing healthcare with care. So you're not just there for a job. But I think in any job you actually, when you are working, how can you care for your clients and think. What's the best for them? And part of that, what's the best for them is you being the best version of yourself as well.

Kingsley: Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So, moving forward 'cause obviously you've, you've pivoted a little bit Yes. Into the whole resilience type of thing. [00:28:00] Uh, how else can resilience, do you deal with people outside of work organizations personally in their own resilience, whether it be to. With family or sporting teams or anything like that?

Or are you more focused on the, the workplace?

Garce: At the moment I've mostly been doing keynote speaking and workshops. Okay. But I'm always open to opportunities, so I think if people are in different sort of industries, yeah. I. I always like to just be currently exposed to opportunities and see how I can be of value using my experiences.

Yeah. Awesome. Yeah. Yeah. I'm not closed off to that at all. And sporting teams actually is, um, something I've worked with before because I owned a, a physio practice actually in the past. Yeah. Gotcha,

Kingsley: gotcha. And it is obviously one of those things that it doesn't matter what area we're of life we are in.

Yes. We do need to have resilience to a degree. Yeah. Because life's gonna hit all of us.

Garce: Yes. I think no one ever has the perfect life. Yeah. And whether or not it's big challenges or small [00:29:00] challenges, it's actually about how you look at those challenges. And we were talking about before how, you know, lucky Australians are, and, uh, sometimes I share this in team workshops, like, you know, when they have conflicts how, like whether people can actually move forward from conflict and forgive or reconcile.

If you look at. For example, you know, Nelson Mandela or, or people who have gone through, like where they lost family members, like how can they forgive and move on from that. There's so many people who suffer so much more who can actually forgive. Yeah. So I think when you actually gain perspective from different people's experiences, then your sufferings might pale in comparison and you can actually, you know, learn how to move forward or look at possibilities of resolution.

Yeah.

Kingsley: No, that's, that's really good. And it, and it's, it's interesting, again, going back to that whole perspective, if you take someone like Nelson Mandela and what he went through in his whole ability to forgive people, uh, [00:30:00] forgive what had happened to him and go on then and work really hard at making.

South Africa's so much a better country, um, that there is, and what he did and the resilience that would've taken him like to be stuck in that cell as small as it was and as tall as he was. Mm-hmm. To get through and be resilient, to see that through to the end. It's. Uh, I think when you really pull, boil it down and think about it there's a lot to be gained out of that.

Mm-hmm. Um, and I think every one of us can look at that and go, okay, how much more? Sometimes I sit back and I think, how much more can I give? How much more longer can I survive? How much, and it's almost like going. How much more resilience do I actually have in a sense, isn't it?

Garce: Mm, yes, that's right. Um, I think, yeah, life is about giving, but you need to give from a place where your cup is full as well.

Mm. And um, you know, I also like to talk in [00:31:00] terms of like teen connections, stuff about like the five love languages and actually being aware of like how. You communicate when you need your cup filled and and you know, filling each other's cup up and showing appreciation. I think when your cup is empty, then you have no more to overflow onto other peoples.

Yeah, yeah.

Kingsley: No, that's, that's actually really good. The Five Love languages. And if you haven't seen the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, it's definitely worth reading, checking it out, and it, it's amazing how accurate it can actually be. And obviously, you know. Things are different for different people, but it gives a good guide of where you're at, how to understand yourself and understand other people that you're working with or maybe your partner or whatever it is as well.

Garce: Yeah, and on on my website, I actually have a, a free downloadable where I give some examples of how people can apply that in their workplaces because the five love languages written for mainly relationships or, you know, relationship with your family, but actually. It applies to any relationship that we [00:32:00] have, including our professional relationships.

Kingsley: That's awesome. Yeah. So, uh, we will get to that at the end. I wanna get how people can get in contact with you and do all that, but that's that. I'm so glad you've got that. Yeah. Um, we are coming to the end of time, unfortunately, but I always ask a couple of questions. Uh, we talk about the ultimate tomorrow, at tomorrow is not today a lot.

Yep. So let me ask you, what is your ultimate tomorrow?

Garce: Gosh, I haven't thought about that before. I think my ultimate tomorrow to right now, because I have a 1-year-old actually, is how can I live a life where I leave a legacy for him and actually teach him how to become a man who is resilient and love God and love people.

So I think that for me, I. No matter what form that takes would be my ultimate.

Kingsley: That's awesome. Yeah. I love that. If he, if he grows up like that, yeah, you can't be wrong. Um, [00:33:00] and the next question that goes on with that is how can you create your ultimate tomorrow?

Garce: I don't know whether we can create as such.

I think we can respond to what happens to us. In the correct way to enable it. But, um, you know, being someone with, you know, from a faith background, I believe that there is a higher power and God actually is in control and we don't know what our tomorrow will be like, but we can respond in the correct way no matter what that tomorrow is.

And for me, you know, even when times are tough, if you can see there is. A purpose for it, or when we look back on our challenges and then you go, actually, that was for a good reason and what I've experienced in the past can actually help me with my tomorrow, then you actually have hope and you don't have to fear tomorrow at all.

Kingsley: I love [00:34:00] that. Love that. That is so cool. Dr. Grace Shaw, how can people get in contact with you if they want you to do work in their business to speak or just download the, um, the five love languages and how they can operate? How can people get in touch with you?

Garce: So my website is just my name, so Dr. Grace Sha.

D-R-G-R-A-C and my last name is SHA dr shar.com. Um, so you can find me on that website. I'm also pretty active on Facebook and LinkedIn and Instagram, all those good, you know, social media platforms. Um, but I love connecting with people and you know, I love connecting with you as well. So thank you for having me.

But I always love talking to people with. No agenda and actually finding out how can we collaborate together and, you know, use our experiences for good.

Kingsley: Yeah. Fantastic. Thank you so much for joining us. It's, it, that whole thing about resilience, about grace, uh, that you put in there. All of that is [00:35:00] absolutely fantastic and there's some great takeaways that we can, we can literally do right now.

We don't have to go away. We can do those things right now. Thank you so much for joining us. Thanks for joining us on The Tomorrow's Not Today show, and, uh, we look forward to another episode. Make sure you go in, listen back, jump onto, uh, Dr. Grace's website, get that information and remember to create the life that you want.